GLOBAL DIVORCE TRENDS: 
What are the trends that are emerging globally with respect to divorce? I thought I’d summarize what I’ve found so far since I’ve started this “global” experiment on Divorce Saloon. It is quite fascinating to me the patterns I see emerging. But just as a disclaimer, these bits of divorce information you are about to read are not the result of scientific experiment or study. These are only my opinion/observations and have nothing whatsoever to do with actual studies on this issue.
DIVORCE & WOMEN
Globally, women are economically disadvantaged to a much greater extent than men following divorce. From the Far East, South America, Africa, the Americas and Europe, more women than men seem to have trouble finding their financial footing after a marriage ends. In New York, the law with respect to spousal support/equitable distribution leans towards preserving the “standard of living” during the marriage. But notwithstanding the occasional celebrity or female CEO who out-earns her husband, most women make a fraction of what their husbands make and after a divorce, there is a global trend that men start to have more disposable income, and women skew towards less disposable income. The problem is particularly acute when there are children involved, in spite of child support laws in most countries.
DIVORCE & RELIGION
Religion, particularly Christianity, is factoring into divorce less and less. All across the globe, including the last bastions of religious conservatism/extremism in the Middle East, the rate of divorce is climbing and people (especially women) seem less inclined to let their religious beliefs trap them in an unhappy marriage. Countries like Iran in the East and Mexico in the West have seen huge spikes in their divorce rates, comparatively speaking.
In Latin America, the Catholic Church has historically served as a hedge against divorce, as most in Latin America identify as Catholics and have traditionally adhered to the Church’s teachings about the evils of divorce. But the Church is less an issue for most folks in Mexico. Especially now that Mexico has become a “no fault” jurisdiction and more women are earning their own salaries. Other Latin countries are trending similarly. As far as interesting divorce information, this is interesting, I would have to say.
In the Mideast, (including Israel) things are slower to change but change is definitely occurring. With the possible exception of Saudi Arabia, even in the Muslim World where divorce has historically been frowned upon (Is divorce contrary to the teachings of Islam? perhaps.) and women have been kept under the veil, more marriages are crumbling. I read recently that the divorce rates in Muslim countries like Iran, for instance, are on the rise. In Yemen, an 8 year old girl even went to Court to divorce her 30 year husband, gaining international fame as a result.
In New York, religion does not seem to play a significant role in the divorce calculus for most people. Same is true for other “blue states” in the North, like Maine for instance, a hugely “secular” population, where the divorce rates is second only to Nevada as being the highest in the United States.
In traditional Bible Belt states such as, Florida, divorce is climbing furiously as well. Even pastors are giving their congregations a run for their money where divorce is concerned. Recently in Utah, the Catholic Bishops came out with a letter detailing a number of issues they had with their constituents, and defending DOMA. Among other things, you guessed it, the climbing rate of divorce amongst Catholics (in addition to homosexuality, contraceptive use and fornication) was one of the main things on their minds.
Across the pond, I don’t see the Church of England having a huge impact on people’s perception of divorce, given the high rate of divorce there. After all, London is known as the “divorce capital of the World.” For Londoners, this bit of divorce information must be pretty sobering.
DIVORCE & CUSTODY
Even here in the United States, notwithstanding what you will hear to the contrary, custody of underage children is still pretty much given to the mother after a divorce, except in some exceptional circumstances. In states like New York, the written law is that there is no “tender age rule” however, the net result most of the time is that women are getting custody. However, change is occurring globally on this issue and men are slowly but surely chipping away at this stereotype and demanding their rights. Just recently in Japan, the issue of custody was brought to the collective global consciousness when an American father was arrested and jailed in Tokyo for “kidnapping” his children who had been, in his words, “kidnapped” by their mother and taken to Japan without his consent. Japan, which is not a signatory to the Hague Convention, has vowed to re-evaluate its custody laws as a result of that case. At the present time, the country definitely follows the Tender Age Doctrine and the mother is the presumptive custodial parent.
It is not, however, as if the entire globe is universally prone to award custody to the mother. In Muslim countries like Saudi Arabia, for example, there is a presumption of paternal custody whether he is a “fit” parent or not. In fact, in Saudi Arabia, even grandfathers would have more right to custody of children than their own mother!
But there is this other trend, which is totally unexpected, where more women DO NOT want custody of the children and are happily handing custody over to their husbands after a divorce. This, along with the trend towards more “celebration” of divorces (with divorce parties, for example) and shacking up with much younger men after divorce (cougar style) goes to show that as time goes on, the stereotypical role of women in the family, and post-divorce, will completely go the way of the dinosaur.
PRENUPS & DIVORCE
Globally, prenuptial agreements are gaining favor, even, for example, in Great Britain (the “Divorce capital of the World”), where, traditionally, the prenup has not been enforced and clearly not worth the paper it is printed on. Just recently in Britain, Baroness Deech called for divorce reforms in England and for these pre-marital contracts to be enforced by English Courts. Here in the United States, prenups are presumptively enforceable for the most part.
I can think of no state in the Union where the prenup is presumptively unenforceable. More and more American couples are entering into prenuptial agreements to protect their assets in the event of divorce.
Very few billionaires -the world over – for example, do not have a prenuptial agreement. However, even working class individuals the world over are either getting prenups, or at least have it on the brain as the concept gains popularity and becomes more infiltrated in the public consciousness through hip hop songs, movies and other media.
Finally, more than half the states in the U.S. have opted into the Uniform Premarital Agreement Act. In fact, these states are all signatories: Arizona, Arkansas, California, Connecticut, Delaware, District of Columbia, Florida, Hawaii, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Maine, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, New Mexico, North Carolina, North Dakota, Oregon, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Texas, Utah, Virginia, and Wisconsin) Pursuant to the Act, parties can enter into an agreement without consideration and still, it will be enforceable.
DIVORCE GROUNDS
Here in the United States, New York is probably the only “fault” jurisdiction left. What that means is that unless you can prove grounds, you cannot get out of a marriage in New York State. In other states, all a party has to prove is “irreconcilable differences” even though many do have other grounds upon which a marriage can be dissolved. Many in New York are calling for reform of the ”grounds” situation in the state.
But that works both ways. In Arizona, for example, I read a few month back that some folks are calling for “no fault” to be abolished. They feel it allows men in particularly to too easily leave their families financially disadvantaged, amongst other things. Around the world, no fault divorces are gaining favor. Look at Mexico for example which recently became “no fault.”
In Europe, no fault divorces seems to be de rigueur, except in Italy where the Church seems to hold much sway, still. In Spain, a recent study shows that Spaniards have no hang ups about divorce and are second only to Brazil as far as their approval of divorce.
In the Mideast, not so much. Women in particular seem to be put through the washer to get out of their marriages. Not to pick on Saudi Arabia, but it seems the biggest transgressor as far as this issue is concerned. It literally gives the husband veto power if the wife gets the divorce or not. Some of the rules seem particularly arcane, if not ludicrous. Ditto for India. But not China. I read the other day that in China, you can get out of a bad marriage in just one day, following the reforms in 2003. What about Africa? Africa is a more complicated issue. I have not been able to decipher the trends there yet. I’ve done a few posts on South Africa, for example. But since there are so many religions, customs and ethnicities, it will take a bit more time for me to figure out the patterns on the Continent.
In the Caribbean, I am thinking that no fault is also the emerging trend, even though divorce does not appear to be as pressing an issue in the islands as it is in more developed nations. In the Dominican Republic, Americans and other non-residents can obtain “quickie divorces” from the island nation – no questions asked.
DIVORCE IN THE EAST VS. THE WEST
There is no question that divorce is more commonplace in the West. The East is definitely seeing rising divorce rates, but what they call “rising” is almost a joke when compared with us on the other side of the Atlantic. China’s divorce rate is somewhere around 20%. They see that as an “epidemic.” In Singapore, Korea, Hong Kong and Japan, the rates of divorce are on the rise. But it is relative when one looks at countries like Sweden where more than 50% of marriages end in divorce, and the United States and other developed countries where the rate of failed marriages is north of 40%. There is no contest between East and West where divorce is concerned, even though all countries are trending upwards as far as divorce rates per my observation. In other words, there is not one country in the world where I can think of that has a falling divorce rates. But some rates of divorce are just off the charts where others are still modest, though rising.
It is not just secular societies. In traditionally ultra conservative Jewish Orthodox demographics in places like Israel (well, this is technically Mideast as opposed to East), for instance, divorces are up as with every other group.
Although, in Iceland, a European state, and also a historically Pagan one, I read the the rate of divorce is pretty “stable” when compared to European and other Eastern European countries.
In South Asia, the divorce rate though rising, is still the lowest in the world. India, and Sri Lanka, for instance, have divorce rates under ten percent. What is this attributable to? That is a good question. But it is interesting to note that most marriages in these countries are still arranged, versus “love” marriages in Europe and the West.
GAY DIVORCE VS. STRAIGHT DIVORCE
Gays who have gained the right to marry have not shown they are any better at holding a marriage together for the long haul than heterosexuals. In fact, given the limited number of gay people who are married across the globe (when compared to heterosexuals) it almost seems to me that their divorce rates are disproportionately higher than the rest of the populous. I have said in a recent post that marriage has become like “sport” for both gays and straight and I advocate a “marriage permit” for both constituents as I mentioned in this post http://www.divorcesaloon.com/would-requiring-a-marriage-permit-like-a-learner-permit-for-drivers-reduce-the-divorce-rate. I think people need to prove that they can handle marriage before they are given a marriage license sort of the way they have to prove they can drive before they are given a driving license. I think the State, globally speaking, has an interest in maintaining the stability of family. And right now, it seems to me that if the trends I am seeing continue, “family” as we know it will become extinct.
DIVORCE & DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Domestic violence is on the rise the world over. And divorce seems to exacerbate this. In fact, I would even say that in so called developed countries like Britain and United States, the problem has reached pandemic proportions. Just the other day in Britain, two husbands were convicted on manslaughter for slaughtering their wives. In each case, the subject of divorce had come up and the husbands went ballistic and killed their wives. None of these men were convicted of murder, only manslaughter, and both will serve only a modicum of time in jail.
In the U.S., domestic violence is a growing menace. It is often the precursor to divorce. Same is true in the Middle East and Far East.
Domestic violence does not seem to discriminate as far as race, socio-economic group, education, orientation, or other variables. In New York earlier this year, a Muslim man decapitated his wife after she asked for divorce. But women are also becoming increasingly violent towards their spouses as well. In New York just recently, two women committed extreme violence towards their husbands. One in Queens poured hot water on her husband’s privates while he slept; the other in Staten Island sliced him up with a kitchen knife, also while he slept. In both cases, the husbands wanted a divorce, but did not want their wives sent to prison. In Florida, a wife hired a hit man to kill her husband and is still waiting to stand trial for the botched criminal solicitation. Countless women around the world seem to be copy-catting the trend of cutting off their husband’s/lover’s penises. It is a very scary, disturbing trend that I see occurring. The rising level of violence directed towards spouses by their own spouses really makes the blood run cold.
DIVORCE & BILLIONAIRES
Economic factors tend to be mitigating where divorce is concerned. In other words, the more money people have, the less they seem inclined to divorce. But since the global recession of 2008, it seems that billionaires (and almost billionaires) the world over, have been having a tough time hanging on to their marriages. One thinks of folks like Sumner Redstone, Boris Berezovsky, Roman Abramovich, Henry Silverman, Silvio Berlusconi, Steve Wynn, Scot Young, Peter Brant, Ali Bongo, Bernie Ecclestone, Dmitry Rybolovlev, Allen Stanford, Russell Simmons, George David, Andrew Madoff, Elie Hirschfeld, Laurence Graff, James Clarke and Tim/Edra Blixeth, amongst others, who had their marriages implode in 2008-2009. Nothing like a recession to completely annihilate high net worth marriages! It goes to show that financial instability can and does rattle even the strongest marital unions. Heck, it looks like Donald Trump is the only high profile billionaire who managed to hang on to his wife during this time – even though some of his business ventures got into a bit of trouble.
DIVORCE & CELEBRITY
Celebrities as a group tend, in my opinion, to be less inclined to hang on to their marriages till death do them part, than the rest of population. Hence, an entire category on this blog called, “Celeb Splits.” Other than the relative short life span, the only other trend I see emerging with celebrities is the increasing ”expense” of these high profile marital implosions. Madonna’s divorce from Guy Ritchie was without too much of the requisite celebrity drama, but she paid an astounding price for the privilege. Paul and Heather. Mel Gibson and his wife. Michael Jordan. So many celebs paid handsomely when their marriages ended in divorce.
Other quasi celebrities, such as CEO’s of major transnational corporations, also tend to have blow out divorces and the wives are very likely to push for an overturn of the requisite prenup - even though it is usually upheld by the courts. The divorce of UTC chairman George David, Jack Welsh, Donald Trump (from Ivana), and others are inclined to have very public spectacles with money always at the root of the issue.
DIVORCE & ADULTERY
By and large, adultery tends to lead to divorce more often than not. This trend crosses racial and socio-economic lines. But experts will tell you that less people than before are getting divorced because of a cheating spouse. I would disagree with that. I think that in the vast majority of cases, adultery is at the root of most divorces the world over.
DIVORCE & SOCIAL NETWORKING
Lately, there has been a global trend with using social networking to end a marriage. We saw that in Saudi Arabia where a couple of husbands texted their wives “I divorce you” three times according to Sharia Law and got out of their marriages. We saw it in Britain where a couple of people got on Facebook and we saw it here in New York with YOUTUBE sensation Tricia Walsh Smith. In Brazil, the government is even allowing people to divorce on the Internet no questions asked! Plus, technology such as GPS, text messages and emails are front and center in a lot of divorce trials (usually to prove adultery.)
There is no question that in the years to come, marriage will become more easily expendable due to the Internet and due to technology. Divorce will definitely be a spectator sport.
MY GRAND CONCLUSION
If current trends continue, I question whether the institution we now call “marriage” will exist when my grandchildren become adults, in, say, 2050. But having done this blog for about a year now, I have found myself questioning, for the first time ever, whether marriage should exist in the first place - a scary thought for a basically Catholic girl to conceive.
What do you think? Do you agree with my observations? Or no?
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