Meghan, Duchess of Sussex and the Duke of Sussex are now officially husband and wife. Already, there is speculation about how long this marriage will last.
Answer: Don’t worry, there will not be a Meghan and Harry divorce anytime soon. At least, not for the next 5 years. Because both of them would want to keep up appearances and save face and defy the odds their parents suffered with their own marriages. But it is not going to be easy to navigate this high stakes marriage.
How can Meghan Markle and Prince Harry avoid divorce in the next few years?
Keep a low profile.
This will be counterintuitive because both Harry and Meghan love the spotlight and their jobs as ambassadors to the Commonwealth’s youths around the world will take them on global jaunts with the press snapping photos and writing stories at every turn. Initially, this will feel like a rush and it could be hard to resist. But if she looks at the successful royal marriages she will see that all of these were lived out of the spotlight. She should look to a woman like Camilla Parker Bowles for inspiration on how to hang on to a royal marriage – not to Princess Diana whose playbook shows the exact opposite. And scarily, Meghan is more like Princess Diana than just about anybody in the palace right now. She is not going to be able to hide very easily. But if she wants to have a long and successful and lasting marriage (as opposed to a high celebrity profile) she would hide a lot more than she puts herself and her relationship out there for unnecessary scrutiny by people who, quite simply, don’t mean well for her relationship.
2. Have a few babies.
Even when you are not married to royalty, the odds stack up in your favor when you have children of the marriage. Having kids does not ensure that divorce will not happen, but it does reduce the facility of just ending the marriage and moving on to something else when there are kids involved. She should do like the Duchess of Cambridge with this. Get pregnant almost immediately and keep getting pregnant. Harry and Meghan should aim to have about 4 kids in rapid succession. Keeping Meghan at home barefoot and pregnant may seem cruel given her propensity to be out there in front of the cameras and her own admission that she wants to “hit the ground running” as far as her work goes. But if her ultimate aim is a long marriage and not a long career as a celeb/royal, she should focus her energies and time on building up an army of children with will cement her bond with her husband rather than looking to be out there gallivanting and hamming for the cameras.
3. Step lightly with those other royals and whatever she does, Meghan should NEVER outshine the Firm’s members
The one thing Meghan hopefully understands is that the only star the royal family is prepared to accept in its ranks, is the Monarch. Right now, that is Queen Elizabeth. This is the thing that did in Princess Diana and her marriage to Prince Charles. She made the mistake of outshining her husband. She made the mistake of putting the press, photos and interviews and other people’s fascination with her, above her husband. She made the royals look frumpy, old, out of touch, out of fashion, classist and racist. If Meghan wants to save herself from a similar fate as Diana, she has to guard against this and not repeat this mistake. She has to dull her own natural light – which is a mega wattage one – and she has to do so considerably in order to fit in; because failure to get this right will create trouble between her and Harry and he will not be able to save her from the wrath of his family and ultimately, he is of the House of Windsor. He loves his family and will choose them over Meghan. She has to fundamentally understand this and, in a manner of speaking “stay in her place,” in order to have a successful and lasting union.
4. Forget this foursome thing with William and Kate.
It is well meaning but naive on the part of Harry to think that Kate and Meghan are going to be sister friends and are going to share the spotlight and glory of the House of Kensington. Kensington Palace is Kate’s. At least it is in her mind. She is the mistress of this castle and there can be only one. But it is worse than that. Kate is English. She has known William and Harry a lot longer than Meghan has. Meghan is new. She is in outsider and in some ways, an interloper in the eyes of many – and not just in the palaces! The foursome thing is a mistake for all concerned. The couples should work on their own causes separately and if possible, Harry and Meghan should move to a palace of their own. In the long run, this will be better for the two couples and Meghan’s marriage to Harry has a better chance of working out.
5. Let Kate & William Shine
Meghan has to be able to let the Duchess of Cambridge shine and not hog the spotlight. Meghan is naturally more electrifying than Kate and people are going to be more interested in her than Kate. This will cause jealousy on a scale never seen before and it will spill over into the relationship between the brothers and Harry will be in a tough spot and he will have to choose between his brother and his wife. This will be a tragedy as the brothers are so close and clearly love each other so much. Is it fair to Meghan that she has to dim herself in deference to Kate? No. But it is what it is. If she wants to keep her husband and marriage, it is the price she will have to pay. Frankly, if she was not prepared to do this, she should have said “no” to the marriage. There is no way she is going to get around this. And the dynamics is even more than just Meghan being “electrifying.” It is her whole biography that puts her at a disadvantage in this scenario. It is also timing. And it is the fact of the Monarchy and what it all means and what is expected in the future. She has to defer to Kate and she has to practice doing so from the very beginning or it will ruin her marriage, for sure.
6. Avoid being a fashion plate
Yes, the media will almost encourage it but Meghan has to be smart about how she presents herself to the public. She has to wear things more than once and she has to be careful about how much she spends on clothing and jewelry and she has to otherwise watch her expenditures. The media will try to set her up into becoming a clothes horse for their entertainment. But it is a trap and she should not fall for it. Their only interest is turning her into the next Marie Antoinette and look what happened to Marie. So, this is something that Meghan will have to be very careful with and it goes to the point made in (1) above – keeping a low profile. This will cause less tensions in her relationship.
7. Have some interests of your own
Meghan gave up all her life to be with Harry including her country, her blog, her job and even one of her dogs. As romantic as this may seem, it is a big risk and down the road, it could prove to be a problem between them once the Honeymoon period wears off. She does not have to have insanely diverse interests but she has to have something that is hers. Acting in an occasional G rated movie that is not embarrassing to the royal family and that doesn’t take her away from her family for a long period of time (and if it films in London!) shouldn’t be beneath her. On the contrary, it may be good for her and her relationship in th end.
8. Be careful with this “feminist” nonsense
It sounds good and all to declare yourself a “feminist” but in the context of her new role as a member of the royal family, Meghan has to re-evaluate what that even means and how is she going to act this prophesy out. Because it is a minefield of potential problems and conflicts. And it is a whip that can be used against her at every turn. Really, if she is smart and she wants her marriage to last (no matter whether her husband supports her in this or not) she has to shut her mouth about being a “feminist”. She can do what she does without saying that word. It’s better.
9. Don’t try to change the Royal Family too drastically and too fast
The royal family changes in its own time and in its own way. Those who have tried to revolutionize it always fail or die. The fact that the royal family accepted a biracial woman into its ranks should not be seen as a big fundamental change in their basic character. Meghan is an exception. She is not going to be the new rule anytime soon. Why? Because if she becomes the rule, the royal family will cease to exist. Rightly or wrongly, this is fact. It is a fantasy, a fairytale to think otherwise. Just as easily as they opened the door to let her in, they can open it and kick her out if they begin to feel like their position, their very existence is threatened by her antics. She must never get carried away into thinking or even desiring to “change” the royal family, or worse to “revolutionize” the royal family. She cannot win that and her marriage will not survive that.
10. Lower expectations
Meghan has to keep her expectations of the royal family very low. She has only to look at her own family to see how dysfunctional family can be. This can happen even in royal households. It is just that they are better at concealing the dysfunctions than most. There is at least one Samantha Grant in Windsor and this person will not make it easy for the Duchess of Sussex. It can be hard to take if she is unprepared for it and if she thinks or expects that Harry’s family is going to be “better” than her own. Sure, you are not going to have this trashy behavior so openly on display in the House of Windsor they way you did in Florida with Meghan’s half sister Samantha. But there is going to be palace intrigue and there will be betrayals and people will hate and there will be jealousies and really, it won’t be very different from her own family. Once she knows that, she will be better armed to cope and protect her relationship but if she goes into this with these lofty expectations and they get dashed, her relationship will suffer and probably will not survive.Sign Up! Get Free Giveaways, New Ideas & Latest News Valid email for entry Thanks 🙂