How do you rebuild confidence after divorce?
Rebuilding self esteem and confidence after divorce can be hard sometimes depending on the circumstances surrounding your break up. Below are 7 tips for helping your personal process along:
Nothing saps your self esteem like lying on the couch feeling sorry for yourself. Instead of letting yourself fall into a mental rut, go out of your way to keep yourself busy doing everything and anything you possible can. Literally create work for yourself if you don’t have anything to do and it is hard to imagine anybody who has nothing at all to do – no matter how independently wealthy you are. And it doesn’t have to be paid work. You can volunteer. The idea is don’t just sit there being idle because you open yourself up to some very negative emotions when you have too much time to think.
2. Date on the rebound
Dating on the rebound definitely has a dirty reputation but handled judiciously, it can be very beneficial to your psyche and self esteem and your confidence levels. It is frankly one of the best ways to rebuild confidence after divorce. You just can’t go too crazy with it because then you will have diminishing returns. But a new guy or gal on speed dial soon after your divorce is very much a welcomed distraction for many and a confidence boost too.
3. Join a gym
Even if you have a home gym, if you are struggling with confidence issues and you are trying to rebuild your confidence after a divorce, going to a gym where there are other people is much better than staying cooped up in the house by yourself. It will help your motivation for one thing. But just seeing other people and communing with other people while you work on tightening everything will take you a long way towards rebuilding your confidence after divorce.
4. Hang around friends who make you feel good
One of the best ways to rebuild confidence after divorce is to hang around people who make you feel good about yourself. No frenemies at this time please. And this includes your mother, sister(s) and so called best friends. Some of these people can be frenemies who have a knack for saying exactly the wrong thing at the wrong time and making you feel so much worse, so much more insecure. When you are trying to rebuild confidence after divorce, you have to avoid people like this who make snide and snarky remarks and use innuendos and reverse psychology to dig at you. Only hang around people who truly are your friend and want you to feel better about your self and your situation.
5. Join a divorce support group
Finding a group of supportive friends who are going through a similar experience as you is one of the best ways to rebuild your confidence after a divorce. There are many such groups all over the place including on the Internet and just a few minutes of research should find you one that is suitable.
6. Consciously work on looking your best
When you look your best, you feel so much better about yourself. So when you are struggling to rebuild your confidence after divorce, one thing you cannot overlook is your physical appearance. Not only should you be hitting the gym but consider how you dress and how you fix your hair and your makeup and things like that. Go shopping if necessary to spruce yourself up.
7. Let go of the past and stay optimistic
In the past, your relationship may have robbed you of some of your self esteem and now that it is officially over, you have these negative thoughts reverberating in your head and you are having a tough time silencing these thoughts. But nothing can wreck havoc on your self esteem and confidence like past hurts and disses that keep reverberating in your head. You literally have to bury the past and in some instances, you have to imagine it didn’t even happen. You have to move on to the future and look to the future with an optimistic view about yourself. This is the only way you can rebuild your confidence after divorce.