On Needing to be Married to be Happy, by Kate Nguyen

DO PEOPLE NEED TO BE MARRIED TO BE HAPPY?

married to be happy
married to be happy

One of my colleagues informed me today about this famous guy- Elon Musk – who said that he “needs to be in a relationship in order to have a happy life.” We had a long conversation about this topic first of all because she is obsessed with everything Elon Musk says and does (honestly, I think she really believes they will marry and have babies) but also because it is just an interesting topic.  Do people need to be in relationships in order to be happy? Do they need to be married in order to have a happy life?

I think the answer is yes and no. Personally, I like being in a relationship and I have been in a relationship since I was fairly young. But I also know people who are alone who seem perfectly happy with their lives and I know a lot of people in relationships who are miserable as hell.

I think this is such a personal issue and for the guy who said he needs to be in a relationship in order to have a happy life that that is true for him. This is what he needs. I have learned that he married the same woman twice? I am one of the few people who didn’t know that about this guy but this post is really not about him even though it was a discussion about what he allegedly said that inspired this post.

I do think that nature intended people to have companions and companionship. This is the very essence of nature. There are very few species in this realm that can truly exist happily all alone. Everything and everyone needs something and someone to be perfectly balanced. But it does not mean that being slightly imbalanced cannot produce enough happiness to satisfy a person and it does not mean that the mere having of a relationship renders a person “balanced.” Relationships can really fuck with your equilibrium as a matter of fact and for some people, this is always the result when they are in relationships – is an equilibrium that is out of balance. So for those types of people, it is better to be alone and that is how they are happy and there is nothing wrong with that or with them.

Of course, relationships are one thing and marriage is another. Do you need to be married to be happy? Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t think so. I think a person can be perfectly happy in their lives without ever once getting married. And I think a person can get married or be married, and, as I said before, be miserable as hell. Look at the divorce rate in most places if you doubt this. Marriage does not make people happy necessarily. It can feel like a trap in fact and make them miserable and desperate under certain circumstances. On the other hand, if the marriage is good, it is very, very good and perhaps there is no greater happiness than that. This is Elysian Fields.

What do you think about this? Do people need to be married to be happy?

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