Do you have to sit back and let your kids be exposed to an angry, controlling, jealous and impatient new woman all in the name of co-parenting and joint custody? I mean, what if your husband’s new missus just straight up can’t stand your children? She doesn’t hit them and leave marks (that would be easy) but she does other things and the kids don’t like her at all. In fact, they don’t want to go see their father, as is ordered by the court, because Jocelyn is at his house; Jocelyn just moved in, in fact, and the kids are afraid of her. She is very strict and she gets daddy to put them in time out constantly, and otherwise interrupt their free reign of the house.
This is actually an easier problem to handle than if the kids loved her, I would think. But it is still a difficult problem. Because you cannot dictate who daddy dates, can you? But you don’t want some stranger making your children miserable. Daddy can date her but she does not have your permission to mis-mother your children!
It seems the first step is to have a talk with daddy to see what is really going on. Is he aware that his new skirt is making your children miserable? If yes, what does he propose is the solution? If no, is he deliberately being obtuse and oblivious? Or are the children exaggerating? It is hard to know. But first, daddy will have to be willing to discuss this issue with the girlfriend and maybe with the girlfriend and the kids. Best case (if it is possible in your situation) with the girlfriend, you and the kids. But a discussion has to be had.
After the discussion, steps and strategies should be agreed upon as far as the children’s boundaries when visiting daddy and as far as her girlfriend’s boundaries with the children.
Enforcement should follow. If the problem persists you may need daddy’s visitation to occur outside of the girlfriend’s presence. This could require a court visit and a motion as well as a judge’s order. It all depends on the specific realities of your particular case.
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