Diary of Asha Pabla Day two: I WILL STAND BY MY MAN

ASHA

Dear Diary,

I’ve been speechless with horror last few days. My world is crumbling. My marriage on the precipice and I feel like the end is hovering over me like a Moscow cloud.

All the news media and the bloggers and the neighbors are speculating about the state of my marriage, my bank accounts, my husband and my children. This one website, Divorce Saloon, even speculates that I am possibly considering divorce and have had the temerity to try to give me pointers.

Well, I do declare and this is my last testament on this issue, that I WILL NOT DIVORCE MY HUSBAND NOW OR IN THE FUTURE. I am with him through thick and thin. I love my husband. He is innocent and it will never be proven that he traded insiderly. My husband is a good man, a brilliant man, a philanthropist. He is a decent man, a good father. A wonderful, caring son who gave more than he ever took from anyone. And I will never divorce my husband.

What I want to do now is to get a stylist for him. A picture tells a thousand words and clothes do make the man. I have looked at images of Bernard Madoff and I see what the writers at Divorce Saloon mean. Raj needs to get better suits and he needs to wear a tie in public from now on. I can’t and won’t have my husband look like a criminal just because he is seen without a tie, and just because his neck is on the large side. People are very judgmental about things like that and I will see to it that this situation is rectified.

Raj will be wearing suits and ties from now on. The thing is, he hates ties, my beloved Raj. It is uncomfortable for him and it scratches his neck. He does not own any ties at the moment. But I am going to call up….where should I call up? Brooks Brothers? I think I will have Brooks Brothers send someone over the house to measure Raj and get some new clothes for him, and some ties.

I also will lay off the carbs. He loves my cooking and I am flattered. But for purposes of these proceedings, I think if he loses weight and wears a tie, he will be judged less harshly.

That is all for now, dear diary. But please understand that under no circumstances would I ever leave my husband at a time like this. I LOVE MY HUSBAND. He is innocent. We will prove it. His children and I are behind him 1000 percent!

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