Laughter: the ultimate antidote to divorce and it can save your marriage

Laughter can literally save your marriage!

A lot of people don’t laugh enough. Or if they do, it is not pure. It is usually poisoned with ridicule at someone else, sarcasm, or envy. It is not just a pure gut laugh for the sheer joy of living.

In marriage, I suspect that there could be more laughter between more couples and that if there were, there might be less divorces. But, alas, there is a real dearth of pure humor between couples, just as there is in the rest of the population.

And it is not as if humor can be “learned.” If is not as if laughing for the right reasons is something that can be taught….wait. Stop. I feel like what I am saying is bulls^&%….What am I talking about? Let me try this again….

I have always been someone who laughed a lot. And sometimes inappropriately when taken in the context of time, place, manner. And don’t ask me what I laugh about because I can’t answer that. There are so many things that could throw me off balance and leave me spastic with amusement. I guess you could say I am easily amused and meanies would say that it means I have a low IQ.

Whatever.

I just think that laughter can save a marriage. I think people should only marry other persons who make them laugh a lot, or remain a spinster. Don’t get married. It will likely end in divorce in that case. Are you someone who laughs a lot? If so, you know what I am talking aobut. I love to laugh, personally. I crack myself up almost every day. Writing this blog? Omg, I am laughing constantly. Just now I re-read one of my posts where I said something about “flatulence” which was so out of context and unexpected, I couldn’t stop laughing. Sometimes, I think I laugh too much and that it is inappropriate given my age and my profession….I’ve always had a laughing problem in church, for example. I was 30 before I could get through a mass without going to pieces….

Laughing is great therapy and it is good for marriage, I think. A couple who laughs together, stays together. But it has to be appropriate laughter. I can’t advice you on that. I was never could at discerning when it was appropriate not to laugh. Once, I even laughed in court. I couldn’t help it. It was the judge. I was fresh out of law school and I was interning with him for the summer. (He’s the one I got the quip “the herniated disc comes with the car” from, btw.)

 He was a civil judge in the civil part in Kings County in Brooklyn. Why did he crack me up? Dunno. It was the look on his face as he listened to testimony in a personal injury case. I can’t describe it, but it was a very hilarious expression. I wasn’t laughing at him. I would never do that. But his expression was just too much for me to absorb with any degree of maturity and keep a straight face. It was too much. I tried my darndest to hold back my mirth, but let me tell you something, it just exploded from me at one point. The entire court room turned to look at me. Humiliation is not even adequate to convey what I felt, but then once they looked away, I was having hysterics again. The more I tried to hold it in, the more amusing things became. And the more serious the judge looked when he shot me angry glances, the more my system couldn’t stop laughing, so I just walked out the courtroom and didn’t go back the rest of the afternoon…

What is the point? There’s no point. Except that…and, I mean, nobody should laugh as much as I do (actually even I don’t laugh as much as I used to, to tell you the truth) but I have found that nothing is as bad as you think it is if you can just laugh. Sure, marriage is tragic. It is calamitous. It is hard. But I think if more people found a way to laugh at the idiocy of it all, they might yet save their marriage over the long haul.

Just laugh purely, though. Never in sarcasm, or at someone else. But just for the sheer joy of being alive. If you make it a habit in your marriage, I think it would be the best antidote against divorce. (Please don’t ever marry someone you can’t laugh your head off with. Trust me, you will never be happy with such a person.)

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