NEW YORK: Rosie O’Donnell’s wife Kelli on how to move out while the divorce is pending

The Enquirer is…omg I am quoting the Enquirer! What is this, a tabloid?! …

Well, whatever.

The Enquirer is claiming that former “View” talk show host Rosie ODonnell and her wife Kelli are having a marital spat over an alleged kiss Kelli had with a Broadway star who was a “long time friend” of the couple.  Hogwash, right? When I heard that I was like, “huh?!” For some reason, I didn’t think that lesbian couples cheated on each other. Is that sexual-orientationalist? To have assumed that one of the fringe benefits of such a relationship is the fact that you don’t have to worry about your husband or boyfriend cheating on you and bringing home unpleasant surprises?

I mean, I know it probably sounds all wrong, but I am being truthful. It’s how I thought for some reason. I’m sorry. Watch as I put my foot further in my esophagus… but I could have pictured same sex male couples cheating, but it just never occurred to me that same sex women would cheat on each other too. I mean, is there nothing sacred?

I guess adultery comes in all types of marriages, huh? Boy. Go figure. Well, given the way Rosie is said to have gone ballistic after she heard, I would say if Kelli is planning to “move out,” she better do so very very carefully, and in the early hours of the morning when Rosie is dead asleep. No, seriously. Kelli needs to have the get away car gassed up and ready to go, all her treasured belongings in the trunk ahead of time, and enough cash to get her through at least a few months, and pay the divorce attorney.

She probably should have some documents packed too, like bank statements, social security numbers, employment contracts, residual contracts and whatever else she can neatly store in a box which she puts at the bottom of the trunk. She does have about 4 kids with the Missus, so Kelli has to think about what she wants to do there. I wouldn’t suggest taking them very far from the marital abode where they are used to living without a court order of custody. Not that Rosie would win a kidnapping suit, but it is probably going to be in their best interest to be raised in the home they are used to. So Kelli wants a court order before moving them.

As for the real estate, boat, and cruise ship, marital property no doubt. So I don’t think she loses anything by moving out. Unless she wanted exclusive possession. If she wanted exclusive possession, always better not to move out. The law will probably find that she gave Rosie de facto possession when she packed her bags and drove off in the wee hours of the morning.

But what am I talking about? Kelli will never leave Rosie. Not if I have Rosie pegged right.

Sign Up! Get Free Giveaways, New Ideas & Latest News Valid email for entry Thanks 🙂

You must be logged in to post a comment Login